Effective Coping Skills for Overcoming Self-Harm

In the face of emotional distress, some individuals may resort to self-harm as a means to cope with their feelings. While this can provide temporary relief, it's not a sustainable or healthy solution. It's crucial to recognize the importance of developing alternative coping strategies to navigate emotional pain. This article will delve into understanding self-harm and its triggers, and offer effective coping skills to help individuals deal with challenging emotions.

Understanding Self-Harm

Defining Self-Harm

Self-harm refers to deliberately injuring oneself, often as a way to cope with profound distress, anger, or sadness. Common methods include cutting, burning, or hitting oneself. While self-harm may bring temporary relief, it's not a long-term solution and can lead to more significant emotional and physical problems.

Identifying Triggers

To effectively cope with the urge to self-harm, it's essential first to understand what triggers these feelings. Triggers can range from external factors, like an argument with a loved one, to internal factors, such as feelings of worthlessness or overwhelming sadness. Recognizing these triggers is the first step in developing strategies to address them.

Effective Coping Strategies

According to Cornell University, learning and understanding coping strategies for self harm can be a helpful intervention. In the below, we list various coping strategies that one can self-employ or learn and receive in a dialectical behavior therapy skills group below.

Distraction Techniques

When the urge to self-harm arises, distraction can be a powerful tool. Engaging in a different activity, whether it's drawing, listening to music, or taking a walk, can help divert the mind from the immediate urge and provide time for the intense emotions to subside.

Seeking Social Support

Connecting with trusted friends or family members can be beneficial. Just talking to someone about how you feel can alleviate the emotional intensity and provide a sense of connection. If opening up to loved ones feels too daunting, consider joining a support group where you can share your experiences and learn from others.

Physical Alternatives

Sometimes, the physical sensation is what individuals seek in self-harm. In such cases, alternatives like holding onto an ice cube, snapping a rubber band against the wrist, or taking a cold shower might help. These methods can provide a physical sensation without causing lasting harm.

Mindfulness and Breathing Exercises

Practicing mindfulness can help ground individuals in the present moment, making overwhelming emotions more manageable. Breathing exercises, in particular, can help calm the body's physiological response to distress, making it easier to cope.

Continued Growth and Support

Professional Help

For many, professional intervention can be invaluable in overcoming self-harm tendencies. Therapists or counselors can provide tailored coping strategies, support, and a safe space to discuss feelings.

Educate Yourself

Understanding the underlying reasons and emotions behind self-harm can be empowering. Seek out resources, books, or online articles that provide insights into this behavior and ways to overcome it.

Celebrate Small Victories

Every time you resist the urge to self-harm, it's a significant achievement. Acknowledge these moments, no matter how small they might seem. Over time, these victories can help build resilience and confidence in your ability to cope.

Creating a Safe Environment

Limiting Access to Tools

One practical step towards curbing self-harm is to limit access to tools commonly used for self-injurious behaviors, such as razors, knives, or other sharp objects. By placing barriers between the impulse and the act, there's an added window of time to reconsider the decision and utilize alternative coping strategies.

Establishing Safe Spaces

Create a designated space in your living area where you can go when feeling overwhelmed. This can be a corner of a room filled with comforting items, soothing colors, soft textures, and calming scents. Knowing there's a safe space to retreat to can provide relief during moments of intense emotional distress.

Holistic Approaches to Healing

Physical Activity

Engaging in regular exercise has proven to be effective in managing stress and alleviating depressive symptoms. Activities like walking, jogging, or even dancing can release endorphins, which are the body's natural mood enhancers.

Art Therapy

Expressing oneself through art can provide an outlet for emotions that might be difficult to articulate. Drawing, painting, sculpting, or even simple crafts can act as therapeutic tools, allowing individuals to process and reflect on their feelings.

Engaging with Nature

Spending time in nature has a calming effect on the mind. Whether it's a walk in the park, tending to a garden, or listening to natural sounds, these experiences can be grounding and help in recentering oneself.

Reframing Thoughts and Beliefs

Challenging Negative Thought Patterns

Negative thought patterns can be a significant contributor to emotional distress. Cognitive-behavioral techniques can help individuals identify and challenge these harmful thoughts, replacing them with more positive and constructive beliefs.

Setting Realistic Expectations

It's essential to understand that healing is a process. There will be setbacks along the way, but it's crucial to focus on progress rather than perfection. Celebrate each step forward, and remember that every effort counts.

In the journey towards a life without self-harm, the most important thing is persistence and the belief that change is possible. While the path might be filled with obstacles, the human spirit's resilience, combined with effective coping strategies and the right support, can lead to a brighter, healthier future.

Grouport Offers Online Group Therapy & Online DBT Skills Group


Grouport Therapy
provides online group therapy for anger management, anxiety, borderline personality, chronic illness, depression, dialectical behavior therapy, grief and loss, obsessive compulsive disorder, relationship issues and trauma and PTSD. Our licensed therapists lead weekly group sessions conducted remotely in the comfort of members' homes. According to participant feedback, 70% experienced significant improvements within 8 weeks.


You don't have to face these challenges alone. Join our community and work together towards a brighter future. Sign up for one of our groups today and begin your journey towards meaningful, lasting change and renewed hope.

We also offer skills groups, such as our dialectical behavior therapy skills group. Our DBT Skills Group, is a therapist-led module driven group that will provide you new skills to replace behaviors and emotions causing friction in your daily life and relationships. It is excellent for interpersonal connections, building social skills concerning relationship issues, improving emotion regulation & distress tolerance, and developing deeper mindfulness.

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